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Have You Been Ordained?
This semester I am teaching, again, in the Counseling
Psychology and Counseling Education department at the
University of Missouri-Kansas City. The class is
"Introduction To Professional Counseling."
Twenty five graduate students sit with me for several hours
each week and we get to know each other pretty well. Their
first paper has been handed in, titled, "Why I Want To Enter
The Counseling Profession."
What do you think they say? What are their reasons? Well,
it's not for the money: average national salary for a
masters level counselor is $35,000. It's not for the status
or prestige: counseling is still highly stigmatized and few
clients go to counseling because they want to.
Semester after semester, these students regularly cite three
major reasons:
- As they have grown up, other people, family and
friends have come to them for counsel, support and
advice. From this the student infers they are "good" at
helping others.
- They are curious about what makes "the human being
tick", and in turn curious to know themselves.
- Each student has been around significant others who
have gone through a tough emotional experience or they
themselves have been through their own
emotional/relationship trauma. During this troubled
time, counseling helped and they want to pass on the
same help to others.
Other reasons are more personal and varied, such as tired
of an existing career or wanting to augment an existing job
or career with an advanced degree in human services.
Reason #1 catches my attention. We are so hysterically sure
in this culture that we determine our own personal destiny.
There is some truth in this. We do have a part to play,
choices to make. But here's the big question for me; how
does it happen that we ignore the part others play in our
choices? Could it be others play a bigger role than we can
imagine or care to admit?
Maybe the way it works is that others see in us certain
skills and talents. They then approach us to access those
and in so doing validate and initiate us into a particular
role or function. Some human theorists say that others
around us in effect "ordain" us into any life's work (not
just the priesthood). "Symbolically, we attain ordination
when those with whom we live or work recognize that the
contributions we make are beneficial to their personal or
spiritual growth." (Anatomy
of The Spirit, Caroline Myss, 1996).
Of course, we have our choices to make. We can accept the
influence of others and circumstances or reject it. We do
make our own pathways in that regard. But what I think
Americans tend to miss is that we are not alone. Others
around us influence who we marry, how we think and what life
work we do.
We are surrounded with wisdom that reflects back to us who
we are and what we can become, what we are becoming. What a
tantalizing mystery!
Cheers. |
